Hi Folks!

First, before i start rattling about how and what am feeling today, let me bring to your notice that my blog address has been changed. It is now bimchum.blogspot.com. Perhaps most of those who visited my blog never cared about what it was, but I still had to change it since Bimchum is the word that most people associated to my photography are familiar with. Lets not talk about why i did it now or all that bla bla, i had to do it before it was too late and thats it.

So, heres a wave from your old….yours truely..

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Hmhhhh! Its a heavy morning today. No! nothing bad happened, but just a sad realization. Yesterday evening, I attended the birthday party of one of my childhood friends. And we celebrated it like kids, with cone caps on head, annyoing plastic whistles, popping balloons filled with glitter and all that. Wish i could share you the video. But anyways, the matter is that he had invited a lot of people, his friends and colleagues, but only 3 of us showed up among which me & my wife were the 2 πŸ™‚Β Β  He was disappointed, but couldnt complain. Thats all our story! We all have similar stories to share. We are a bunch of lonely souls running frenzy to meet our wishes and needs and yet yearning deep to be with our beloved ones and be kids once again.

Those above are all representations of beautiful moments of some of my very close ones.

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The hinge here is that we all love to be surrounded by our close mates when we are in mood to relax but we are never around them when they are in that mood. Aint i right? The beautiful wine glasses that we shopped for such occasions wait forever in their shelves. We shop for nice dresses and never have the people around who actually loved to judge and remark us with kind words or screw our moods for the sake of fun!

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I walk by bakeries and watch the breads and buns in amazement as to how wonderful days i had being kids. Collecting tids and bits of whatever money we had and run to nearby outlet to buy a few pieces of our favorite snack and drool over it. It would be like 3 pastries and 10 eyes rolling over them πŸ˜€Β  and yet out of love we all used to make equal shares by cutting them in silly shapes only to justify that “i didnt take the larger piece!”

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Comeon guys! Seriously! when was the last time that we had an outing with our parents? or went out for a dinner or lunch treat with our grandparents? All their lives, i have seen them praying for me, wishing me success and blessing me with all the goodness that nature can provide. And i have reaped the fruits of those best wishes. But am living so far from them that even meeting them becomes an yearly affair. Am feeling bad just by watching my close friend disappointed yesterday and wonder how many thousand such disappointed evenings must my parents be spending back there at home. I wish they had a great gang to meet up and freak out every eve! 😦

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I dont know where am going with this feeling, but am slightly relieved that i spoke out my heart to you. Somewhere i feel like if i really realize this darkness so well, then i have plans to cure it as well. It has always been about my life, my achievements, my dreams and so on. I guess, thats what they too wished for me, but not this way. Not the way that they would be left alone and left yearning to see their kids once a year. Its a tough life out here and its even tougher to make them realize that I really feel for them and want to be with them to pamper everyday. They understand that, but thats not enough. They dont ask for it, but i havent given enough. They never spoke for what they really wanted, but i havent dived deep enough to know it either. Thats why am alone…..deep in my heart, its lot more soft and vulnerable…..not as crazy and lively it looks from outside!

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Its never that bad, am never that sad, but the point is….its never that late, its never that difficult as i always think it is.

Do you think the same?

Beep!….trying to mute the noise! 😐

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